Every father since The Fall has experienced fears about his role parenting his children. But in every generation God has bestowed His strength, power and grace on godly parents to lift up a righteous seed. Below are six expectations straight from God’s Word that our heavenly Father has for earthly fathers everywhere. To make the expectations easy to remember, they spell FATHER.
God’s Six Expectations for Fathers
F is to be Faithful
Be faithful and cleave to your wife, the mother of your children (Genesis 2). Unfaithfulness always has consequences. If you want to raise a righteous seed, be faithful to your wife in the middle of a faithless world. (A wife also needs to remain faithful to her husband.)
A is to be Attentive
Be attentive to your children (Ephesians 6:4). As Josh McDowell says, provoking is “rules without a relationship.” If kids don’t know you care, they won’t care about your rules. Each child is different and unique. God loves us personally, and fathers need to love their children uniquely, too. God wants us to be good stewards (not owners) of the children he’s given us, raising them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The only way to do that is to be attentive to them. (Read about Eli in the Old Testament; he didn’t correct his sons and look what happened.)
T is to Teach God’s Truth
Even if you don’t have any formal training you can still teach God’s truth (Deuteronomy 6). The dynamic here is to continually teach them. Say to your children, “I want you to truly love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind,” (Matthew 22:37). Sometimes we allow our relationships to be split over things that aren’t worth it and are insignificant. We need to not just teach them, but teach them God’s truth.
H is to have a Heart Set on Spiritual Truth
Fathers, pass the baton on to the next generation. Do that by allowing your children to see your own spiritual growth as you live out Ephesians 6:10-20 and James 5:16. Be open with them and confessional with them; and when you blow it, accept the blame and ask for forgiveness. “I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” Share struggles and prayer requests and let them tell you their struggles. Then pray about the struggles together.
Always be ready to sit down and pray with your child. Let them know you will be praying with them for their spiritual growth. Ask them to pray for you in your spiritual growth. Let them see the importance of spiritual growth, day in and day out.
E is for Earnestly Leading Your Children
May your eyes, as fathers, be ever toward the Lord (Psalm 25:15). And may you be able to say to your children, “Follow me as I follow the Lord.” We should be able to say to our children, “I’m not perfect, I struggle; but may my eyes always be on the Lord.”
R is for being Responsive to the Needs of Your Wife and Children
Endeavor, by God’s grace, to meet their needs while pointing them to the ultimate “need meeter.” Sometimes we can’t meet their needs; but we should strive, by the grace of God, to the best of our ability to do so (Colossians 3:19, 21). Be responsive to their physical, emotional and spiritual needs — the affirmation to instill in them a sense of confidence in who they are. As you do so, turn their hearts toward the ultimate “need meeter.”
These six expectations for fathers provided in God’s Word take ongoing work to achieve; but He would not have given you the gift of children without the ability to also raise them in Christ. Be faithful to Him, do the work of the Lord and ask Him for strength, power and grace. He loves you even more than you love your kids.
Do you have a favorite verse for fathers to live by? Let us know in the comments.
This blog was originally written by Linda Weddle in June 2014; it has recently been updated by the Awana Editorial Team.
